Fun with an experienced 'tist, part 1

So, saturday night, it was the same sort of thing, only moreso and with different kinks. I got home from work, showered in a hurry, put on a hot outfit and drove an hour to The Society in Connecticut. I was going there for the munch and play night; to meet and, barring extenuating circumstances, play with one Amhypnotic and his play partner Sluttydee.

Certain friends of mine tried to convince me to go to the drive-in with them, saying things like "seeing Inception with us will be more fun!" But like was like "no way man, I've already seen Inception, and I'm getting hypnotized tonight."

So, I found the place alright, after calling the aforementioned friends to be all "I'm on a sketchy street and there's no signs for the Society, am I in the right place??"

I was. I caught a short, first-timers-to-the-dungeon presentation, then ate some dinner with Amhypnotic and Sluttydee and others at the munch, and then we wandered off to play. There was a room in the back with a bar and some soft lighting and several big, comfy couches that looked, to me, ideal for tranced-out people to sit on. Or lie in various compromising positions on ;)

Amhypnotic put Sluttydee under first, while I watched. I didn't go under that time myself because 1) he did it very quickly, and 2) they were very quiet! (and, 3, I didn't want to go under yet, and he wasn't trying to put me under) I was sitting right next to Amhypnotic, but I had to strain to make out any of his words. Though I did hear Sluttydee saying "yes, sir" very softly every so often, which was really hot.

He told her that she wouldn't be able to see or hear me, that I had gotten up to check out other parts of the Space, but that she would be able to feel me if I touched her. He woke her up, and I had fun poking her with my apparently-cold hands for a bit, but I'm a poor top and not sadistic in any sense of the word, so he put her back under and removed that suggestion.

When he woke her back up, he played with her freeze trigger, which led to Dee saying "I feel like a barbie...wasn't there some kind of life-size one?" And I laughed. "Oh, god, we had a my-size barbie growing up, and my catholic, vanilla, no-sex-before-marriage sister would be horrified to hear me talking about that in a dungeon." They laughed.

I might tell her anyways, actually, she knows I'm into kinky sex, she just doesn't know the details. And it might amuse her.


Anyways! Dee left to go find spankings and rope and a top to do both, which left me and Amhypnotic alone on the comfy couch. "You should put me under," I said, "and give me a trigger to put me back under quickly, and wake me up. Simple stuff to start with." He agreed, and I got into my best hypno-subject position: feet flat on the floor, sitting up straight, palms on lap (to be as comfortable as possible after getting as relaxed as possible, of course).

He did an eye-focus induction, which felt quick, but I lose time in trance, so I can't be sure. I would write out the induction, but I sure as hell don't remember the exact wording he used! XD I can say that he is very good at what he does. Nice soft voice, nice cadence and pacing, excellent safety measures, excellent pandering to the particular bits of my hypnofetish that I'd shared with him. Oh, and he was also stroking my arm the whole time, which was a welcome distraction for my busy mind. Well, previously busy mind. ;)

So, I was under. Longtime readers of this blog will know that I have been no good at talking once I'm out, right? He fixed that by giving me a suggestion that not only would I be able to speak clearly, but that hearing my voice talking while in trance would make me go deeper. And good god, hearing my voice while I'm under is hot as hell. It's all soft and trance-y, and when I'm under I only ever talk when I'm told to, so there's a delicious overtone of obedience there. Seriously. Hot.

He gave me a re-induction trigger with the standard precautions: prefaced it with my name, keyed only to him, and he added that I wouldn't go under unless I was "in a position to do so," which I interpreted as both physically and mentally/emotionally/consensually.

Then he woke me back up, and I am going to take this moment to gush about how nice it is to have a 'tist who knows how to wake you up properly! I am totally capable of waking myself up, but I'm always kind of groggy afterwards, and it ruins the illusion that the top has control over me. I particularly liked the cue Amhypnotic used: his Voice is really quiet, much quieter than his normal speaking voice, so when he's waking you up, he gradually has his voice get louder (or fades his Voice, I spose), so at "five" you can't help but be back and awake. It's awesome.

We decided the next thing we'd do would be to turn up sensation on my skin. And, well, I figured we'd see what happens, but I suspect Amhypnotic had a different outlook. :p I was skeptical, but it totally worked! I told him that my neck was a major erogenous zone for me already, and after he'd turned it up I was writhing around from him just stroking it. It was soooo nice. And hot.

After that, we tried some hallucinated bondage. This was interesting! My attitude towards it was "sounds like fun, if you can pull it off!" not because I was all "ha, prove him wrong" but because my experience with hallucinations has been lackluster, to say the least. He put me under and tied my wrists together with imaginary rope, and tied some sort of... it wasn't really a harness, more like he just tied a rope around my arms and torso, such that I couldn't move my arms or hands much. I remember thinking, vaguely, as he was describing the ties, that such-and-such a tie might not be the best idea, but I went along with it anyways, because it was hypnotic bondage, and the possibilities were limitless. Kind of like being in a dream, where weird shit's happening, but it makes total sense to you at the time. He suggested that I would see, feel, and hear the rope-- "well, inasmuch as you can hear rope. You can hear it rubbing against your clothes, can't you?" he grabbed my wrist and rubbed it over my dress, and I nodded. "good girl."

He woke me up, and I looked down at my hands, kind of dazed. "Well, I can't see it, but, uh, I sure can feel it." I tried to move my wrists around, and I couldn't move them very far apart. "This is so wacky! It's like my disbelief is really, really really really really suspended!"

(awake I might've been, but able to make intelligent statements, apparently not!)

He put me back under and removed the bondage, then woke me up and had me move around to show that the ropes were indeed gone. Then he asked how I felt about turning my hands into a proxy for my pussy. I was all for it (I mean really), though I added "good luck!" and he scoffed at me. "'Good luck'? Good luck with the sensations? Good luck with the bondage? You're better at this stuff than you thought you were." Annnd back under I went.

I was impressed at how he manifested it, and how readily the suggestions took. He started with, "well, you haven't felt my hands playing with your pussy yet, but you can remember others', how good it feels, can't you?" and I nodded and squirmed a little. I think he had me remember about those sorts of sensations a little more, then, to the best of my memory, he went right into "if I touch your palm more lightly, it will feel like more of a teasing sensation, and if I touch it harder, it will feel like I'm touching you more directly..." And he put some safety stuff on it, of course; if I left the room it would no longer work, and after he turned it off it would no longer work.

(for the record: my memories are not fuzzy because we were doing any amnesia-play. They're fuzzy mostly because I am short on sleep, and also the exact words a 'tist uses are not something I generally remember. This is to say, I'm a little fuzzy on details for normal reasons, not unethical or nonconsensual ones.)

So then the real fun started. He woke me up, and shook my hand, obviously amused. "Hi, how're you doing?"

I moaned.

Then he picked up my hands and put them palm-to-palm. "Hm, what does this do?"

I frowned, and squirmed a little, trying to figure it out. "Well, I mean, I guess it'd be like I'm masturbating, right? It... feels... really good." I said, getting melty because he'd moved on to gently stroking around the outside of my palm. "Tease."

"Yes, but you want me to tease you, don't you." Was it just me, or did his voice get just a touch softer? "You love being teased, don't you." He pressed hard on the center of my palm, and I became a small puddle of yes-yes-yeses.

It was an.... interesting sensation, having touch on my hand evoke sensations and reactions the same as someone touching my pussy. It, I, yeah, I'm not even sure I can describe it accurately, other than it felt fucking good and was ridiculous amounts of hot. My subconscious assigned general teasing sensations to any light touch anywhere on my palm, per the suggestion, but then it seemed to take some liberties. A feeling like my clit was being stroked had been assigned to the perimeter of my palm, and a feeling that I was being fingered perfectly had been assigned to the center of it.

I don't know if I've mentioned this on this blog before, but I have some mild performance anxiety with regards to coming in front of other people, including sexual partners. This is compounded by my hypnofetish; I can't really get off unless mind control is in there somewhere. This has resulted in me being able to get myself off just fine (porn!), but no other person has been able to. I mentioned this to Amhypnotic earlier: I didn't object to coming in front of him or Sluttydee, I just didn't think it was likely.

So, back to the couch. Amhypnotic was having a smashing time playing with my hands, and I was having just as much, if not more, fun than he was. It's all kind of a haze of pleasure in my mind, but I remember it feeling really, brain-meltingly, good. I was shuddering a lot, and then he started stroking around and in the center of my palm harder, working into a rhythm, and everything started to feel more tense, and then suddenly suddenly suddenly! I was coming, I was definitely coming, holy shit, holy shit, woah.

He let me catch my breath for a minute, then gave me another orgasm. I slumped over onto him for a minute, all afterglow and subspace, then started babbling. I believe my exact first words were: "I am totally floored... except I'm sitting on a couch, so I'm not!" (again, awake, yes; coherent, no, hehehe)

Like, no! I wasn't sure I was capable of that sort of thing! It was incredible! It felt different than it does when I'm using my hands, but it was similar enough that I can say for certain it was real. Just, ah! Wow!

And we weren't done for the night yet, but I'm going to have to continue this later...

Open-eye trances

So Nauzy's gotten good enough to do pretty hot eye-focus inductions. Or, you know, something resembling them; I go under so fast I'm not sure it's fair to call it an induction. :p

The other day he put me under and told me to keep my eyes open, and it was awesome. It was quite different from an eyes-closed trance. Since I'm not used to being under with my eyes open (I associate open eyes with being awake), I found I had to focus quite a bit on staying under, which worked nicely because it tied up most of my conscious mind, and left my subconscious mind free to take suggestions. I rather like the way hypnotized people in movies and such sometimes have blank, open eyes, and Nauzy seems to like that look as well. :p A+; will try again.

In other news, we finally made it to the erotic hypnosis munch in Boston, and got to meet many excellent people I'm sure I'll get to know well, once we can make it out again.

Back to sexy things, he pulled off a really, really hot... I don't know what to call it. I was mostly awake, lying down (I say "mostly," because he put on his Voice and I wavered a bit). I didn't want to get up. He was sitting next to me, murmuring in my ear something about how he may or may not have given me a suggestion, but that I might just find myself sitting right up when he snapped his fingers.

"You didn't give me a suggestion like that," I said, smirking. "I'd remember it."
"Didn't I?" He raised his eyebrows. "But it doesn't matter if I did or if I didn't, because I think when I snap my fingers in a minute it'll be soo easy for you to sit right up," and in a minute, he snapped his fingers, and I sat up.

I honestly don't know what to call it, but the way he set it up and worded it was awesome, and perfect, and totally hot. And I told him so. :p And, of course, sitting up is probably a good thing to start with if he's going to be making me do things on command. Positive reinforcement and all that, and sitting up doesn't have any of the "humiliating trick" associations I make with some common suggestions (forgetting a number, for example. I'm not sure if you could convince me to forget a number, then wake me up and make me count. Maybe if I went really deep, and it was in private, and we'd agreed to it beforehand). I digress. It was excellent. I definitely want more of those, whatever we call them.

Interestingly, though, and probably because I was awake when he started: I made a semi-conscious decision in the very back of my head to comply with what he wanted after I knew what it was. It was like, "sitting up? Oh, I can do that, no problem. But will I?" And I left some suspense for myself. It made me feel a little like I had too much control over the situation-- after all, I know I could've said "no, I won't do that, Nauzy," and, you know, not done it. I kind of crave not having a choice in obeying commands, and fear it very much; enough, I guess, that I run suggestions by myself before I accept them, both on a conscious and subconscious level.

....you know, which is kind of the point; that's what's supposed to happen, after all. So maybe it's not that wierd, anyways. I just wish I wasn't aware of it as much as I am, and I wist I wouldn't start, when I'm under and he gives me a suggestion, and contemplate what he's saying. Maybe we can avoid that if he's more subtle with the way he puts in suggestions. Hmmm.

Flipping pages mindlessly

I'm flipping through a cookbook in a store, kind of quickly but lazily. Nauzy comes up behind me and leans in, starts talking quietly in a particular velvety tone of voice. Something about how I might just start flipping the pages mindlessly... without even noticing what's on them... just drifting...

Then I came to, and flipped back a few pages to read a particularly tasty-looking sandwich recipe. I have decided that this in public stuff can be rather hot!

In which I am very, very obedient

Okay, time I posted some sexy stuff. Nauzy and I have done some marvelous things of late. They seem to all blend together in my mind, though, so I am taking huge amounts of creative license.

I have gotten so very good at becoming so very blank and compliant when he so much as whispers in his Voice. Remember how I used to want so badly to go blank all the time? We don't even worry about it anymore, because when I'm under I might as well be blank. I get so receptive and calm and helpless and mmmm.

I mentioned to him that I thought it'd be particularly hot if he made me say things when I was under. So we got naked and he put me under when I wasn't even expecting it.

"I want you to repeat after me," he said. "'I am deeply hypnotized.'"
"I am deeply hypnotized."
"'I love being hypnotized.'"
"I love being hypnotized."
"'I am completely helpless.'"
"I am completely helpless."
It feels good to be helpless. I love being helpless. It feels so wonderful to be helpless. How does it feel to be helpless? So wonderful.

It actually wasn't as hot as I'd thought it would be. But it was still pretty nice. Somewhere in there I have a vague memory of him giving me suggestions that I loved obeying him, and I'd want to obey him even when I was awake.

..that one was hot. And it worked oh so well. The next night we were saying goodnight out at my car, and he made an offhand comment about how obedient I was and how much I would love kneeling and doing his bidding... and all of a sudden I noticed that my knees were giving way. I was starting to kneel without even having been given a direct command!

"Uh, d'you really want me to kneel in the parking lot...?" I asked. He pulled me back up and kissed me. "Probably not, no. But you are a very obedient, good girl, aren't you?"

I squirmed.

Blogger's Block

Yes. It sucks; I've been wrestling with two drafts and just scrapped them both. Sigh. So, lesse, what've we been doing lately? Really, not as much as you'd think. Due to circumstances involving a zeppelin and a half-dozen suitcases of two-dollar bills, Nauzy is going to be home until at least January. Let the crystal-swinging commence, right? Not really; it's hard to find privacy and quiet enough to do hypnosis... at least without resorting to hiding in parking lots. Which actually sounds like a good idea, I think.

He hypnotizes me every time we see each other, but it's not always for long periods of time. Sometimes the dogs start barking, and (while I don't wake up) his concentration is shot. Sometimes it's in the car really quickly, or he'll pull me into a corner and start whispering relaxing words into my ear at like, the mall. Sometimes he just turns on his Voice for two words, and then snaps his fingers at me to wake up, because I've started to go under. And, okay, sometimes we're just too busy having sex to bother with serious hypnosis. (whereby "serious hypnosis" I mean when we try to get me blank, or put in a new trigger or suggestion, the kind that, for me, takes at least an hour.)

I'm whining. :p He's really enthusiastic about it these days, and it's wonderful. Little snippets of hypnosis are delightful and really push my submissive buttons. The trickiest bit now is, like I said, making time, and trying to define what exactly I like about hypnosis. I'm trying to come up with a set of rules so we can come up with some nice scenes.

Which was the subject of both those posts I scrapped. So we're back where we started. :p

But while I'm at it: What kinds of things do you, my readers, like to see? I'm rambling eloquently but blindly. I'm happy to cater to specific facets of the community (I know there are a bunch of people who really like to hear what trance is like from the subject's POV, any of you reading here?)... I mean, I am a submissive. :p And I'm just as happy to give graphic descriptions of sex, but I don't want to offend anyone's delicate sensibilities or give out Too Much Information, and you're all here for the hypnosis, after all.

So, all you anonymous readers who never comment, I know you're out there! More sex? More hypnosis? More ramblages? Induction scripts? More self-analysis? Naked pix? Do tell. Just don't ask for Nauzy to post, that's asking a bit too much. :p

Time for a new post

(sorry that I've been so long between posts. I am finding that college is, in fact, more work that high school.)

So I'll admit, I'm an emotional person. I get frustrated rather easily, especially when it comes to trance. Some nights I'm just not in the right headspace, or my trigger hits me at the wrong angle, and when I come up I'll be angry and start ranting. Nauzy, who hates to see me in anything but orgasmic distress, likes to whisper "shhh, relaaax..." and I completely melt... I go under a bit, sometimes more effectively than when he uses my trigger when I'm ready for it.

I think it's a matter of how relatively relaxed I am. When I'm lying down, waiting for the order to go under, I'm pretty comfy and on the edge of trance anyways. When I'm agitated, it's entirely the opposite, so when I do go under, it feels deeper and easier.

I'm really not trying to psychoanalyze myself; it just feels good. :)

On to more things he can do in public, oh yes. You know, it's funny, I have never ever been an exhibitionist. I don't even like excessive PDA. But trance in public? Why yes, sign me right up.

Last night we were at Whole Foods, grabbing dinner together. We'd finished eating and were just talking, and inevitably it turned to how I love it when he does stuff that nobody else can see. And he switched on his Voice and down I went, sitting up, leaning on my hand. Beautiful. Restful too, though this time it was green-grey instead of blue. But deep enough to just drift.

What I love about playing in public is the... raciness of it. Nauzy said it himself one time: "I like doing things in public; I feel like I've gotten away with something." And so it is. Nobody notices, nobody cares, but we've done it. And it makes me squirm so.

It also helps that hypnosis is often more subtle than good old-fashioned exhibitionistic sex in public. ;p

A Treatise on Lace

There are a few stereotypes about red-blooded young males that most girls pick up by the time they've graduated from high school:
1. They only ever want one thing.
2. They think that two girls kissing is extremely hot.
3. Black, lacy underwear is really sexy.

Now, I call them stereotypes for a reason; not all guys are of that mindset... but Nauzy, for the most part, is. :p And for us, as a couple, that's not a problem generally: our sex drives match up pretty well, I'm somewhat bisexual, and I like wearing black... but the lace, not so much.

I have never, ever been a fan of lacy anything. Lace is frilly and girly in a way that I am not, and lace on bras or panties makes me think of awkward things. This is not helped by the fact that underthings never have just a little lace; they've always got to be plastered with it.

Therefore, I suggested that he, er, suggest to me that I'll enjoy wearing lace more. He agreed, we came up with a rough draft suggestion, aiming to get me to think about his hands roaming all over me when I think of lace. (and can I just take a moment to say that really blunt, direct communication like this works wonders. Talking about suggestions beforehand lets me enjoy the ride more and I feel more confident in what he's doing. good stuff.)

So the trance. He started taking me down, using my trigger, which works beeeautifully these days. It had been a long day for me, and I think that's why I started blanking out right about when he started giving the suggestion. I stopped listening to the words and tuned in to the sound of his voice, and the navy blue of very deep trance started to get flecked with black; oh so warm and comfortable... and next thing I knew I was waking up.

Oh yeah, it was one of those. I didn't remember anything. Maybe a bit about telling him how deep I was, but after that, nada. And oh, what a thrill! I love the idea of knowing that the 'tist has done something to my mind that I don't know. I'm so clearly not in control and I don't know what's coming next, and, of course, I'm completely helpless to stop it. Mmm.

It wasn't my/our intent for this to happen with something, well, so mundane, but I don't think either of us is complaining. If anything, Nauzy's getting a bigger kick out of it than I am... He mentioned last night something about me having "two more days."

"Two more days for what?" I asked, thinking, Columbus day vacation was last week...
"You don't remember?"
I squirmed. "No! What'd you do to me?!"
"You really don't remember... oh, nothing." I could hear him smirk.

Oh, my. What have I created... ;)

Reliable Trance: Check.

Nauzy and I had been using a scale of one through ten to gauge how deep I've been going, with one as the deepest. This was probably not the best idea for two reasons: one because I am not a number person at all, and two because it was such a small scale. But it worked for us, at least until I broke it. :p

Once over the summer, and just last night, he asked me how deep I was. And I was so drifty and pliant that all I could come up with was "deep." So he went in and revisited two triggers that we've been flirting with; one to make me ridiculous amounts of horny (he's very keen on me wanting to masturbate uncontrollably), and one to put me back under. Haven't tested them yet, but we probably will tonight or tomorrow. Squee. (hm, scratch that, Heroes returns tonight; make that tomorrow or wednesday.)


One thing I would like to ramble about is his Voice. His non-hypno voice isn't really anything special, I have to say. It's quiet and slow and pretty normal-sounding, and I hadn't thought it would make a good Voice until he started his first induction.... and oh, how wrong I was. His Voice is the stuff of MC porn, I swear: it's smooth and rich and deep, and just flows over everything. Makes my eyelids droop oh-so pleasantly. :D